astonishment
— the pause between seeing a little miracle and remembering that the world has always been full of secrets.
this morning, i found a moth asleep inside the sugar bowl.
i don't know how she came to be there.. the lid had been closed all night, and when i lifted it for my tea, there she was - very small and white, resting upon the sugar as though it were freshly fallen snow.
i carried the bowl to the window so that i might see her better. her wings were folded neatly behind her, and there was something silvery upon them that caught the morning light. i whispered good morning to her.
one tiny wing opened, then the other, and suddenly there were many little trembling reflections.
i raised my hand over the bowl, and there they were - dozens of pale specks of light, moving slowly as though sunlight had learned to flutter.
i stood very still.
the moth climbed onto the rim of the bowl, shook the last grains of sugar from her feet, and flew through the open window. all the little lights went with her.
for a while, i wondered whether i had imagined them.
when i returned to my tea, there were a few tiny grains of sugar on the table.
i touched them with the tip of my finger, then put them on a white saucer on the windowsill, not quite sure what one is supposed to do with a little piece of morning.
but i know i should probably replace all the sugar from the bowl.